Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails
by sunshineoptimismandangels
Summary: Written for a Tumblr prompt about Klaine getting a pet. Prompt at the end of the fic.


AN: Written for an anonymous tumblr prompt - prompt is at the end of the fic. Also, a _huge_ thanks to hkvoyage for being my beta on this story.  
Enjoy!

* * *

Blaine was one of _those_ people – what you would call an "animal person". The kind of person that would stop and ask permission to pet any dog someone was walking past him. The kind of person to leave food out for stray cats, the kind of person who pointed out every puppy they passed while jogging in Central Park – even if they'd already passed a half a dozen. He even supported the ASPCA with every Amazon Smile purchase he made.

Kurt was not an animal person. Not that he disliked animals, he didn't. He loved Rocky, the big rescue dog Burt and Carol had adopted once they became empty nesters. He enjoyed Simone, Mercedes' pampered little chihuahua who went on tour with her. Tina had adopted a cat… and then a second one, but she wouldn't let anyone call her a cat lady saying you had to have at least three cats for that. Kurt really liked both of Tina's cats, he understood their general distain for being picked up and love of neck scratches. If he were an animal, he would probably be a cat. No, Kurt didn't dislike pets, but as far as ever owning a pet of his own, Kurt didn't see the point. Pets were messy and smelled and took up too much time and money.

He would continue to enjoy them vicariously through other people.

Or so he thought.

Kurt got home from a long day at the theater; one actor had started stress eating so he had to let all her costumes out. Then the male lead decided that the costumes he had previously adored were all a little too "confining" now, and Kurt had lengthy discussions with the director about modifying them. Kurt didn't actually mind, but still it was tiring. All he wanted to do was get home, order some dinner and snuggle with his fiancé on the sofa as they watched trashy television. That sounded like bliss.

He walked in to his apartment, hanging his coat and bag on the hooks by the door, and slipping his shoes off with a sigh when he heard Blaine calling him from the living room. "Kurt? Is that you?"

"Were you expecting someone else?" Kurt asked with a smile as he joined Blaine, leaning in to give him a quick kiss. Blaine kissed him back but seemed distracted. "Everything okay?"

Blaine's face was tense and a little worried. "Don't be mad."

"What's wrong?" Kurt's heart skipped a beat; a part of him was always ready for bad news.

"Nothing! Nothing." Blaine reassured him, holding Kurt's arms and leaning in to give him another quick peck on the lips. "Nothing is wrong… it's just that… I um… bought something today, and I don't want you to…" Blaine rubbed the back of his neck, not finishing the sentence.

Kurt arched and eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest, "Want me to what?"

"Just keep an open mind, okay?"

"Oh god, Blaine. What have you done?" Kurt loved Blaine more that anything, and he was committed to him no matter what, but that didn't mean he was above making Blaine sleep on the couch if he'd done something truly senseless.

Kurt was imagining all sorts of things, from an outrageously expensive gold foil bowtie, or matching pairs of pink alligator shoes – which _okay,_ Kurt might wear as long as Blaine wasn't wearing them at the same time – to walking into their music room to find a kayak sitting there. Blaine was that unpredictable sometimes. Kurt loved that about him, but right now, it was making him tense.

"I was at the grocery store today picking up a few things for the weekend," Blaine explained, his voice taking on a slightly nervous quality as he slowly led Kurt down the hall. "And they had them all out front, a least a dozen of them, and everyone was playing with them and holding them and there was one that was scared and huddled alone in a corner…" Blaine stopped outside the music room.

Kurt thought he might have heard a noise from behind the door, and it slowly dawned on him what had happened as Blaine started opening the door.

"Oh please, Blaine. No. Say you did not-"

A blur of white movement flashed by them both scampering down the hall and back towards the living room.

Kurt looked at where the thing had darted to and then at Blaine who was watching at him sheepishly. _He did not bring an animal home without talking to Kurt about it first._

"Um, just a sec. I really should catch him." Blaine hurried to the living room, Kurt trailing behind him in disbelief, only to find Blaine laying flat on his stomach by the couch, arm halfway underneath as he cooed, "It's okay boy. You're safe."

Kurt stood nearby arms crossed and foot tapping. Finally, Blaine seemed to get ahold of the creature and gently pulled it out. He stood up and smiled at Kurt with a ball of wiry, matted fur cradled in his arms. "It's a dog." Blaine said, his eyes sparkling.

"I can see that." Kurt was doing absolutely everything he could not to smile himself. He was _not_ pleased, even if Blaine was unfairly adorable right now. "Actually, it looks more like a pile of scruffy fur." Kurt sniffed the air, "And it stinks."

"Oh Kurt, don't say that. You'll hurt his feelings." The little dog was shivering in Blaine's arms, as much of it Kurt could see at least.

Kurt sighed, "Let me see him."

Blaine held the dog out, and Kurt could finally get a good look at it. Some kind of terrier mix most likely. Skinny with bristly looking beige fur and sad eyes. Kurt could understand why Blaine had picked this dog out – he _would_ choose the most pathetic looking creature of the bunch. Kurt rubbed his forehead and sighed. It was impossible to argue with Blaine's tender heart

Blaine tucked the poor dog back to his chest. "Are you mad?"

"I mean… _Blaine_."

"I know. I know I should have talked to you about this first."

"Getting a dog is a big deal. It is a long-term commitment. Especially a little dog, they live a long time."

"I know. And you have every right to be upset with me. But I made eye contact with him, Kurt. And he was so sad and little and scared and _shaking_ … I tried to walk away, I promise I did try…"

Kurt uncrossed his arms and sighed. Blaine was too sweet for his own good. "If we keep him, you get to take care of him. Clean up after him. Take him on walks. He is your dog. Okay?"

Blaine beamed at him, his smile infectious, "I will! I'll do all of that. I'll take full responsibility for him, but could he maybe… be _our_ dog?"

Kurt narrowed his eyes, "Not while he smells like that."

"Don't worry! I got everything he is going to need. Food and a collar and a leash and toys and dog shampoo. He is already fixed _and_ housetrained. It is not going to be a problem. I'll give him a bath now!"

Kurt bit back a smile. "Okay. Fine. We keep him _on a trial basis_. I'm not promising anything, but I'll get him a try."

"That's a deal." Blaine swooped in and planted a kiss on Kurt's cheek, then his forehead and then his lips.

"Stop it," Kurt was laughing by time he pushed Blaine and the dog away, "You smell like dog."

"Well, he is going to smell a lot better soon. _Aren't you buddy, huh? Aren't you_?" Blaine switched to baby talk when addressing to the dog in his arms, which strangely made Kurt's heart swell, then Blaine hurried off to give it a much-needed bath while Kurt wandered back to the music room.

Blaine wasn't lying, he'd gotten everything you might need for a dog, and more. There were toys strewn across the room, a plush purple doggie bed, and a water and dog bowl that were already tipped over and spilt across the wood floor. Kurt groaned and turned toward the hall to grab a towel when he stepped in something wet. He lifted his socked foot with a grimace; it wasn't water.

" _Blaine!_ "

* * *

It turned out that the dog _was_ housetrained. It had just been nervous and excited to be in a new place that first day. As long as Blaine kept up with giving it walks, which he was great at, there weren't any more accidents in the apartment. Though it did seem to love to knock over its food bowl and leave slobbery toys all over the house, it even liked to tug things it wasn't meant to play with from the closet or out from under cupboards. Blaine started childproofing the house. Kurt wasn't sure it was worth the headache. Kurt did enjoy the evening strolls they had started going on so the dog could stretch its legs.

They were walking through their neighborhood, bundled in jackets and holding hands while the dog led the way, it was very strong and willful for such a little thing. Blaine had even bought a little plaid puffy vest for the dog so it wouldn't get cold. It was still too skinny and Blaine doted over it.

"Are you ever going to name it?" Kurt asked watching as the wiry little thing trotted ahead of them wagging its trial.

"Why? Are you getting attached?" Blaine asked turning to Kurt with a hopeful smile.

"I'm not saying that – it just weird to keep calling him _the dog_."

"I've been mulling over some ideas."

"Like…?"

"Levine?"

Kurt scrunched up his nose.

"Okay, okay." Blaine laughed, "Maybe Hammerstein? But that's a mouthful."

"It is," Kurt agreed as Blaine leaned his head on Kurt's shoulder while they stopped to let the dog sniff at the base of a tree.

"Horace?"

The dog looked up at them, as if even he thought that was a terrible idea.

"Does he look like a Horace to you?"

"I've always been bad at naming things," Blaine said with a sighed as they started walking again. "Did I ever tell you what I named my hamster when I was in second grade?"

"No?"

"Hamster."

"What?" Kurt started laughing.

"I named my hamster, Hamster."

Kurt laughed harder which made the dog stop walking and start barking at them, wanting in on the joke, "Oh Blaine, that is so sad."

"I know." Blaine's gorgeous smile overtook his face, "Besides I'm not sure I want to name him yet. Not if he is still here on a trial basis."

"Fair enough," Kurt said, kissing Blaine's cheek. "But you've had him a little over a week and he's made some kind of mess in the apartment almost every single day. Let's see if he can go a few days without making me want to pull my hair out before we end the trial period."

"Fair enough," Blaine echoed, stopping on the sidewalk and bringing his lips to Kurt's in a tender kiss. "He's going to win you over eventually," Blaine whispered and kissed him again.

Kurt smiled into the kiss, Blaine was fighting dirty here, but Kurt was enjoying every moment of it.

* * *

"He's looking at me."

"Is he not allowed to look at you?"

"Blaine. Look at him!" They were sitting close together on the couch watching MasterChef, the dog was planted by their feet staring up at Kurt with big, round eyes. "Did you teach him that? He looks like you when you want something!"

Blaine laughed and shook his head, "I think we are both naturals."

"What does he want from me? Why isn't he staring at you?"

"He wants up on the couch with us."

"But why isn't he staring at you?"

Blaine shrugged, "Maybe he knows you're the one that made the 'no dogs on the couch' rule."

"Do not make me the bad guy for wanting to keep our things nice."

"I'm not."

"We don't want to have one of those apartments that smell like dog as soon as you walk in."

"I agree with you."

Kurt glanced back down at the dog who whined and started wagging its tail. "Sorry mister, but I'm immune to the puppy eyes. Lots of practice resisting them."

"Oh really?" Blaine hand been leaning against Kurt's side but he sat up to face him at that.

"Yes. I am puppy eyes resistant." Kurt smirked as Blaine lowered his chin and looked up at Kurt through his long eyelashes.

"Oh _really_?" Blaine repeated as he scooted closer, parting his plump lips and giving Kurt his best round eyed yet seductive look.

"It is going to take more than the eyes, Anderson."

Blaine smiled and moved Kurt's leg so they stretched out on the couch, and then moved so his body was hovering over Kurt's. "What is it going to take?" Blaine asked, lips so close to the skin of Kurt's neck his warm breath made goosebumps run down Kurt's arms.

Kurt swallowed deeply, "What are you after here?"

"Maybe the dog could sit on the couch," Blaine suggested, pressing a soft kiss to Kurt's neck, " _If_ he stayed on our laps?" Blaine murmured the request against the sensitive skin of Kurt neck, kissing his way up it.

"I… I don't know how." Kurt licked his lips and his eyes fluttered closed, "How we would enforce that?"

Blaine moved to Kurt's jawline and hummed against his skin before kissing the very corner of Kurt's lips. Kurt whimpered a bit. "He's smart." Blaine whispered, "I could train him."

Blaine moved away slightly, looking at Kurt with wide golden eyes, "What do you say?"

Kurt's breathing hitched and his skin buzzed, and all he wanted was Blaine's lips on his own. " _Fine_. But you better stop talking about that dog and _kiss me now_."

"Gladly," Blaine said, shifting so he could roll his body down against Kurt's and kissed him deeply as Kurt pulled him in.

The dog gave up sitting on the couch and pattered away, clearly ignored for now.

* * *

Kurt was in a foul mood as he walked the three flights of stairs up to their apartment. The male lead in the play didn't like the recently updated costumes and insisted they go back to the original design, even though he been the one to request the change. The director sided with the actor, as he always did, and Kurt was left in the back, ripping out seams and muttering under his breath. He hated redoing work that had already been done.

He stormed into the apartment, dropping his things unceremoniously on the floor of the entryway. "You will not believe the day I had," Kurt fumed marching further into the apartment. "It's like working with a male version of Rachel Berry. I want to wring his neck!"

Kurt paused in the living room, but Blaine wasn't there, so he walked into the kitchen. "Blaine? Are you-." Kurt stopped mid-sentence, his eyes falling on the trashcan by the pantry, the lid was partly open and some red fabric was sticking out of it. _No. No no no._ Kurt walked up to it, lifting the lid and pulling out his new Alexander McQueen distressed crewneck sweater – or what was left of it; the material was severely ripped and damp with slobber. Kurt had brought this sweater on clearance and it had _just_ come in yesterday. He'd never even had a chance to wear it!

Kurt took a long deep breath, closing his eyes and counting to ten, before stuffing the ruined sweater back into the trashcan. "Blaine," Kurt called evenly. _It was just a sweater, it was just a sweater_. He would not yell at Blaine about this. " _Blaine_."

Kurt walked back through the living room to the hallway, poking his head in the music room to find it empty and continuing on to the bedroom. He was not going to yell at Blaine – but the trial period was over. The dog had to go.

He opened the bedroom door, jaw clenched and ready to break the decision to his fiancé, but he stopped short once he entered the room. The first thing he saw was Blaine laying on his side, back to the door apparently asleep on the bed. The next thing Kurt noticed was Blaine's laptop open on the desk – the screen was on the Alexander McQueen sight.

Kurt walked quietly to the laptop, it was an order confirmation page – two things had been purchased and shipped priority mail. A red distressed crew neck sweater and a pair of leather buckle monk-strap shoes – both in Kurt's size. The shoes were the very pair Kurt had been pining over for months. Kurt sighed and turned to face his sleeping fiancé.

He tiptoed around the bed to find Blaine sleeping peacefully, the dog curled up next to his chest with Blaine's arm looped over it. Any frustration Kurt had been feeling melted away, and not just because of the order Blaine had placed. Blaine looked so sweet, and innocent and gorgeous. His cheeks rosy and his curly hair a mess, Kurt knew that wasn't just from this nap – he could picture Blaine pacing the apartment after finding the torn sweater, hands threading through his hair as he wildly thought about what he was going to do. Kurt had to smile, the sight of this beautiful sleeping man curled up with a tiny, slightly snoring dog was just too picturesque.

Blaine loved that dog. And Kurt loved Blaine. So damn it, Kurt loved the dog too. Kurt slipped off the suit jacket he was wearing and silently kicked off his shoes. He softly climbed up on the bed so he way lying close to Blaine, facing him with the dog curled up between them. Kurt smiled watching Blaine's lovely face and then leaned in pressing his lips against Blaine's in the gentlest kiss.

Blaine slowly blinked his eyes open and Kurt smiled at him. "Hi."

Blaine grinned back, "Hi."

Kurt couldn't help it he kissed Blaine again, longer and deeper this time, his hand moving to hold the back of Blane's neck – when he pulled away Blaine's breath stuttered a little.

"What was that for?"

"I love you, Blaine."

Blaine blushed and his eyes danced. "I love you too." All too soon Blaine's smile slipped and his features grew serious, "But um… there is something I have to tell you."

"Is it about a ripped up red McQueen sweater in the garbage?"

" _Oh god_ ," Blaine moaned. "Kurt I'm so sorry, but I promise it wasn't the dog's fault. I didn't get home from work until late, and he was left on his own too long and got a little stir crazy. But I've already booked a dog walking service so that won't happen again – oh, and I bought you a new sweater! It will be here in two days."

Kurt smiled and shook his head, Blaine was too sweet, Kurt sometimes couldn't believe how lucky he was to have him. "Blaine, it's fine. I'm not mad. At you or the dog."

"Oh?" Blaine's face lit up, "Really?"

"I guess the trial is over." Kurt said with a smile.

Blaine's face fell.

"If I can forgive him for chewing up designer clothing, I guess that means he stays."

"He stays?" Blaine sat up, waking up the dog who yawned and immediately turned to Kurt placing its chin over his arm.

Kurt laughed, "Oh, he is a charmer. He stays"

Blaine was smiling broadly, the corner of his eyes crinkling, but he quickly scooped up the dog and placed him on the floor turning back to tackle Kurt with kisses. "I love you. I love you. I love you," Blaine said between kisses and Kurt laughed beneath him. He finished with a long sweet kiss to Kurt's lips.

Kurt sighed, looking up at Blaine and feeling perfectly happy. "I love you too."

Blaine snuggled down beside him. "Now we can name him."

Kurt turned slightly to look down and find the dog sitting by the bed tail thumping and almost looking as if it was smiling. Kurt rolled back over to face Blaine, "I think we should name our dog after you, call him 'Charmer'."

Blaine looked surprised for a moment before he tilted his head back and burst out laughing.

"It seems fitting."

Blaine circled his arms around Kurt, "It's perfect. And… _our_ dog?"

"Obviously," Kurt teased and Blaine swooped in to kiss him again.

* * *

End Note:  
Written for this prompt: klaine gets a pet - maybe Kurt finally lets Blaine get a puppy and it tears the house down and Kurt wants to send it back but when he walk in to see Blaine curled up with the puppy he can't bear to separate them.


End file.
